(for a good time, click above)
In the spirit of BIRTHDAY wishes, and taking it easy on everyone at
the beginning of the semester, I'm assigning your task as the following:
Compose a happy birthday message to email@example.com of no more
than a paragraph long, being sure to mention "Partially Hydrogenated
Soybean Oil" and his "lithe, stallion-like physique". This is crucial.
Trust me, this will be funny. As always, forward me a copy for safe
keeping (and , yes, the new and improved point totals will be in effect
THEME OF THE AS YET UNSPECIFIED TIME PERIOD--- Oleo. Work as many casual
references about our friend, the oleo margarine, into e-mail messages to
me or to other sebum afficionados. (See also, firstname.lastname@example.org)
Thank you and have a nice day.
I know, i know...i love chain letters just as much as you do,
and now it's time for the chain letter retribution we've all been waiting
for. Your task is to compose a chain letter- it can be long, short,
whatever....be creative. be disturbing. no restrictions here- except for a
couple of things......
your chain letter cannot contain the letter "L".
your chain letter, in addition, must contain no punctuation, except for the
much underused and underappreciated semicolon (;). call it my little
tribute to the wonderful world of punctuation, if you will.. yes, a
minimalist approach, but it works....
aside from that, go crazy. mail the chain letter to as many people that
you have addresses for (forward me a copy) that are NOT IN GSS '94.....
important - we must spare our own. i'll forward a copy of the best ones on
THURSDAY, which is the deadline......
this one's worth 3.5 points, guys, with an extra 2.5 to the
winner.....copies of task one will be forwarded shortly......
make sure that you make these outlandish, and you can include directions in
these letters to do anything to me (ooh...how kinky) e-mail wise that you
wish (i.e. - "mail Carla Nappi the first line of 'Hamlet" or you will wake
up with 3 naked dwarves in your bedroom. tonight...")...let's have fun, and
i'll be participating, too.....
I almost forgot - anyone finding Dr. Suplee's e-mail address wins an extra
And send 2 copies of each chain letter to tzu-mainn (keeping in line with
the Tzu-Mainn Theme O' The Week) ...... us eof the words tzu and mainn in
separate parts of the letter earn extra valuable bonus points.
my plethora of tears and sorrow have moved me to institute an addition to
the soon-to- come Task Two....call this one, Task Two "Lite" -
In light of the recent ingratitude and snottation of James's
e-mail to all of us, i am in a state of sadness and depression (see also:
Ankur's Home Page :)). :(. Send me an apologetic e-mail, using the phrases,
"Without you, Carla, my life is a black cloud of fear and depression."
"Connie connie connie connie....."
"I miss the scent of your lovely rhubarb perfume, my dear
"Roger Da Silva is a sex god that rocks my world."
"Ohh....and so are you...mmm...yeah."
IN ORDER....it must make sense, and you may only use 13 additional
words (in addition to the aforementioned phrases) in your message. Title
it, "Dear, Sweet Carla..." and sign it, "With deep regret and sorrow,
James Chen and Kevin Murphy".
Actual messages from JAMES and KEVIN will not only remove them from my List
O' Ostracization, but it will award them 2 bonus points (they are both now
@ -2 per ....get that, Webmaster?)
If Connie sends me one, she gets added to my Master list, which i have
neglected to put her on before hearing from her directly....Tracy, get cracking.
THEME OF THE WEEK (last week's was, "Sadowski") : Tzu-Mainn
(where are you, man??)
Any cool Tzu-Mainn-related stuff, sent to me, will earn you
.5 bonus points PER.
12/01/95 forward Connie (our second favorite sadowski twin) a copy of The
Sound Of The Day, with the message, "I love you, Connie!!" -- and sign
it "Roger, the Stick" (a few of you guys out there will know what i'm
talking about.....the Roger thing, i mean.....if you don't, e-mail Da
Silva......i don't want to explain the whole thing) forward me AND ankur a
copy, and you get 2 points. (ankur, maybe this'll make you a bit more
chipper...everyone loves to get mail! ;).
You have until midnight.....good luck.
11/30/95 Find someone named Connie and say "hi." Extra points for getting Connie to send a message to Carla containing "kitten."
11/29/95 Send a message to Bob containing the words delicious, cream, death, cat-o-nine-tails, and oooohhhh in that order (forward a copy to Carla)